Failure is good?

I am the first to admit that failure is not fun. In the moment failure happens I want to crawl under a rock and stay there until I die.

Side Note: I just want to make the statement that I’m talking about the kind of failure that happens in spite of your preparation to succeed. I am NOT talking about failing a math test that you didn’t study for. If you didn’t study for the test then you kinda deserve to fail.

The funny thing about failure is that it will teach you something (if you let it). One of the best things you can do for yourself is learn to get over the pain of failure and tap into the power of failure.

We learn wisdom from failure much more than success. We often discover what we will do, by finding out what we will not do.
Samuel Smiles

There is always a lesson in failure, you just have to find it. Failure could be a lesson in letting go or not giving up or you are a survivor.

There’s a flip side, of course, and it’s this:

The absolute worst thing you could do is let failure turn to fear.

Because once it’s turned to fear then other things start happening; you stop trying, you don’t believe in yourself, you give up. Don’t let it get to that. Ever.

But what if I try again and fail again?

Good question! So I will leave you with this:

Our greatest glory consist not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. Oliver Goldsmith


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Shine on

Do you ever crave a kind word? Just one? Especially on a day where the clouds smother the blue sky and everything looks bleak and you’re not sure when the sun will ever come out again? I know I do. Days like that I desperately need someone to see something special in me and tell me. Remind me. Because I forgot somewhere what it is about me that is special. Maybe some of you have never heard what it is that is special about you. Can I tell you that there is something? I know there is. Your smile. Your eyes. Your laugh. Those things are all special.

I’ve found that finding something special in someone else makes me feel special. When I crave a kind word I try to go out of my way to offer one to someone else. Because I’m probably not the only one having a cloudy day. Someone else is too. I can at least make their day a little brighter and, inevitably, my day shines a little more, too.

Mahatma Gandhi said: “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

Such a great statement for the big, sweeping, revolutionary idealists and for the little spark of an idea people like me. A person who just wants to feel a little special so I’ll make someone else feel special. It’s that easy.

Here are a few ideas to make someone feel special:

1. Make eye contact and smile at someone you pass on the street

2. At Starbucks/Tim Horton’s buy the person behind you their coffee

3. Talk to the next cashier you come across. Say their name and thank them

4. Give a compliment to someone you normally don’t talk to

5. Write a note to a relative/friend/teacher who has influenced you for the better. Tell them how they made a difference

Don’t underestimate your shine!

xo

Free

A smile.

A glance.

A word.

A touch.

What makes a stranger a friend?

A whisper.

A look.

A turn.

A hurt.

What makes a friendship cease?

Embrace the people who come.

Release the ones who leave.

Trust in the divine plan.

Let it set you free.

How to be a Gentleman

I found this letter in a pile of old papers I was going through. Thought it would be a good reminder of what we deserve. I know of a few people I’d like to print it off for and hand it too 😉

Dear Sir,

It has come to my attention that you no longer know how to be a gentleman. Perhaps this letter can serve as a reminder. If you need to, please feel free to keep this letter on you at all times so you can reference it at any moment.

  1. A gentleman is polite. He is kind and courteous to everyone: his mother, his teacher, his friends, his non-friends. He is aware of how he can help the people around him: holding the door open for them, saying please and thank-you, offering his seat on the bus or subway to the elderly or pregnant ladies.
  2. A gentleman doesn’t swear. Or, he if he does, it is done in a discreet manner as to not offend anyone around him and only during appropriate moments.
  3. A gentleman in public does not: belch, fart, get drunk, speak too loudly and is always in control of his mind and body.
  4. A gentleman treats women with respect. He does not ogle them or say anything degrading about or to them. He does not talk down to them. He treats them in a protective manner, her safety always his main concern.
  5. A gentleman is aware of good hygiene. He must bathe and groom himself regularly. He must wear deodorant and not overuse cologne.

Of course, if we do happen to find such a gentleman, you can be sure he’ll be looking for a lady whom he can respect. In order to be one of those, we have to respect ourselves first.

You deserve a gentleman but, more importantly, you deserve to be a lady.

xo

Magic Jeans

I have a pair of magic jeans. These jeans fit me just right whether I’m up or down a few pounds on the scale. Think “Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants” jeans (pardon if that is not a cool reference). I wear these jeans whenever I need to feel good about myself because I’m feeling bad about myself…know what I mean? It’s that feeling when you wake up in the morning and nothing feels right, or good, or great. That means it’s magic jeans time. They give me that little boost I need to feel even an eenie bit better about myself.

So, here’s what I want you to do. Go dig through your closet and find that one thing that anytime you put it on, it makes you feel that eenie bit better. Maybe you have a pair of jeans too; or a t-shirt that brings out your eye colour; or a black hoodie; or Lululemon pants; or a dress; or a pair of earrings; or a ring; whatever it is take it out and hold it up in front of you. Take a good look at and then tell it: “You are my magic ___________, your job is to make me feel a little bit better about myself when I put you on.”

Okay…did you do it? Good.

Now, I want you to put it on. Do you feel a little bit better? Remember, sometimes it’s only that eenie bit. Did you at least smile because this is a bit silly? That’s good too!

Okay, now I want you remember that you didn’t change one bit because of what you put on. You were already great. You were already beautiful. You were already special. A piece of clothing or an accessory can maybe enhance you but you are awesome…just as you are.

Remember that.

xo.